Most places have got their annual retrospective lists published before they’ve even dipped their toe into the icy waters of December. That doesn’t make sense to me, and a lot of those “Albums of 2015”-type lists are generally positive. Now that 2015 is completely behind us, here’s a rundown of what made me fed up about music in the past 12 months.
Bloc Party – Bloc from the dead
I remember when Bloc Party first spawned in the beginnings of the 2000s jangly-guitar-indie-wanker era that collapsed into itself in the form The Ordinary Boys. I hated them then – whiny talk-vocals over bullshit riffs, songs that start nowhere and end nowhere – and in 2015 their corpse reanimated, synths in decomposing hand, to piss me off again.
Radio6 Music is hit and miss and their misses are way off
Emily had always recommended that I listen to Radio6 but, despite my love of music, I always thought radio was something invented while the world waited for TV. I’ve gotten into Radio6, however, and find that when it’s good, it’s really great. But when Bloc Party decided to infest my ears once more, Radio6 seemed to dedicate a week to the broadcast and regular repeat of their live performance. Mercury Rev too, and they’re a sonic diarrhoea fountain. I feel like days of my life have been wasted waiting for Daughter’s ode to dementia and my boredom, ‘Doing the Right Thing’, to finish. Although, it’s all worth it when Iggy’s show comes on Friday night.
Father John Misty is everyone’s favourite poet, essayist
FJM seems to do no wrong among people I know and whose opinions I… if not value, then am subjected to. His music is fine, it’s the forcedly melodic delivery of the lyrics that often lack metre or any singable structure. “Oh but they’re so funny! And clever!”. Oscar Wilde was funny and clever, but that doesn’t mean he could have written a song as good as Gary Numan. I have a similar problem with another of 2015’s critical darlings, Courtney Barnett, but at least she has the decency to chuck a guitar solo in there.
Tame Impala make me want to go sleep and not wake up, in case their terrible music leaves the world too boring for me to live in
…but I’m glad that this joke could happen.
I didn’t get to see Siriusmodeselektor
This is my fault more than anyone else, but it’s still a bitter disappointment to me.
Here’s to more disappointments in 2016. Thanks to Emily for the Zombie synthesist cartoon.