“We can rebuild him”

On 27th April 2016, I left the hospital to come home with my baby. An uncontrollable, uncaring, unpredictable shit machine. It’s messy to clean, difficult to change and it keeps me up at night, waking me sporadically.

I’ll explain.

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Never stand up when you can sit down. And never sit down when you can lie down.

I imagine bathing and grooming beyond The Final Frontier would be a quick and efficient process, like slip-on shoes or Amazon lockers. This is to assume that, by the time humanity reaches further out into space, we have not evolved beyond the need for bathing (either by losing our stink-producing capabilities or by evolving beyond being bothered by human stink).

Lush seems to think otherwise. Continue reading